PUSH ME IN

Can he take me
for what I am?
Do I fit
into his master plan?
He seems so similar to me.
He also has dreams of being free,
of this life,
all this pain,
and strain,
and strife.
No need to lie
speak my mind.
While neither of us shy
so many words left unsaid
leaving all uncertain.
Should I give in?
Innocent wondering
my mind begins pondering
the wheres
the whens
and whys.
Why does this seem like only lies?
I could trust
simply give in
and just
let him lead.
Let him lead
me along
while I sing a happy song.
He'll flash a smile
and I'll follow.
Mile upon mile
only love never sorrow.
Suddenly no light,
only dark,
only night.
With wind that
shivers to the bone.
I'll hold on tighter
hope for home.
Once again that sweet grin,
pull me in a little tighter.
Safe and warm
I'll fear no harm
so I'll blindly follow,
my mind nearly hollow.
Clinging to him,
he'll be brave.
We stop upon a shallow grave.
I look to him
in his eyes
the answers lie.
Once again
that sweet grin,
all the while he'll push me in.

Too Old to be Drunk

Bogus bullshit
Too drunk to fight
Just sit down
Stop screaming
It's gonna be alright

I haven't done a thing to you
Why you badgering me?
I'm only trying to help
Back off and let me be

My God I can't deal with this
Not right now, not tonight
Too much alcohol in me
I can't stop bloodshed
Yet there's no end in sight

Shut up you drunk fuck
I can't take it anymore
You keep this bullshit up
I'LL put you on the floor

The Crazies

Screaming just to scream
Crying out for help
Begging, pleading, praying
I can't help myself

Can anybody hear me?
Is all this just in vain
Can't anybody tell me
why there's so much pain?

I never want to leave you
I won't make it on my own
Daddy, he might kill me
Don't leave me all alone

I don't know why I'm so scared
I fear that I may die
Running, panic, vomit
Someone save my life

My heart is pounding I can't breathe
I need a place to hide
Mommy, you must help me
Try keeping me alive

More Than Yours

More than this
Less that yours
Not enough
Or just too much
Still left wanting more
I should be what I once was
Not for you
Not for love
But just for me.
Why do I try,
and prod and pry?
Just to feel again...
But there's no feeling
Left instead
Is what was once me
But now lays dead
Still this voice
Inside my head
Talking, shouting, screaming
"Don't shut me out you bitch
I'll help you quit feeling!!"
But that is just a voice
With no hands hands to claw with
No eyes to see with
It hides waiting for me
Wanting to be set free
Yet I refrain
Uncertain how to live
That way again
Always feeling
Never moving
Once cynical and Jaded
That hardness has since faded
I want it back
I need it back
I'll have it back
But at what cost?
All I want is to be me
And all I am is lost...

CLICK ME!! I'm an insecure web link in need of attention!!

http://www.etsy.com/shop/FeralEnigma

Humanity At It's Finest

Desired
Wanted
Loved
Admired
To crave a touch
A sent
As we aspire
To be whole
To belong
Want so badly to feel
But it's wrong
It does not take
Anothers' Body
Their heart
Their soul
To be you
To be whole
Still that eternal fire
Burning
Flaming
Yearning
To be Loved
To be Wanted
And Desired

Incessant Ramblings of the Feral Mind

What more can I do?
Run naked through the streets,
waving flags, tossing leaflets?

Who is Feral Enigma?
The more I consider this question,
the less I want to answer it.
The more it is asked of me the more I wish
I were mute so I would have an excuse to not speak.

Ask me again...
Who is Feral Enigma?
What is Feral Enigma?
Where is Feral Enigma?

Ask once more
and I will answer....